I was 12 when we met, and he was 15. He had a funny name, I remembered that much. Although I couldn’t remember exactly what it was. But what I did know is that his favorite color was transparent, he was stuck at home because he’d torn a muscle in his leg, and well… he was weird.

Oh yeah, and he lived in Alaska.

Of course, what did I care? I’d was never going speak to this kid again. As a matter of fact, I was planning on ODing when he went to bed. It wasn’t even worth getting his name. It was probably better that I didn’t, anyway. As soon as you get their name, you get attached. No way was I doing that.
But then he made me laugh.

See, to tell this story, what you have to understand is that I was suffering from severe depression. I met him the same night I was had every intention of killing myself. That was the plan and I was dead set (no pun intended) on going through with it. But of course, as fate would have it, my parents had decided to stay up late that night, and so I found myself on an old forum website I’d taken a liking to recently. I was talking to another girl about my friend when suddenly some random person interrupted with their rude commentary. Naturally, I had to argue with them. At first I took him seriously, but by the end I’d realized that he was trying to rile me up, and so I started playing along. He asked me if I had MSN because he didn’t want to talk on the site anymore, and I decided why not? I’ve got nothing to lose. So I gave him my email and we chatted for a while. About an hour and a half into our conversation, I finally heard my parents retreat upstairs to bed. I told the boy that I was tired and wanted to go to bed. He asked me “Do you have to? I’m having a great time talking to you!” Sigh. Fine. Why not? He’ll go to sleep eventually.

What I didn’t know back then was that he was a terrible insomniac. He never slept. Ever. Sometimes he’d go days on end without sleeping. But I’d just met him. How was I supposed to know? So I kept talking to him, and eventually, I realized that he’d had me laughing all night. It felt nice to laugh again. And too, as fate would have it, I accidentally fell asleep talking to him.

I woke up to a few messages from him:
“Katie ? Did you fall asleep ? xD
Okay ! Well, goodnight! I had a fantastic time talking to you ! =] Hopefully I’ll talk to you tomorrow ? Haha. Well, goodnight. Sleep well and sweet dreams !” 

I bawled. I looked at the pills and threw them across the room. I’d forgotten what it felt like to laugh and actually enjoy myself. I covered back up and for the first time, noticed the warmth from the blanket. I fell back to sleep quickly, feeling terrible still, but better than I had the night before. I woke up and turned on my laptop. Before I could even see my contacts, I had a message from that boy.

Him: Katie ****** ***** ! =]
Me: It’s Kathryn, actually. Kathryn ****** *****.
Him: REALLY ?! Oh my gods ! I’m calling you that from now on. =]]
Me: Ew, don’t. I hate my name.
Him: I hate mine too ! I’m still calling you that though !
Me: What’s yours?
Him: Keizer *******. =P
Me: Oh, well I like your name! It’s nice!
Him: I’m still calling you Kathryn. =]
Me: Why?
Him: Because it’s a pretty name !
Me: So?
Him: It suits you. A pretty name for a pretty girl. =]
Me: Oh… well, thanks. :]]
Him: Hey ! =] <333
Me: What?
Him: I’ve never seen you put a smiley before ! =]]] Did I make you smile?
Me: Yeah.. Yeah you did.

A few months after that conversation, I knew it for a fact that I was crazy about him, and I still was every day after that for the next four years. We’ve always had feelings for each other. Openly. It’s just been a part of our friendship, just how it was. But we couldn’t act on it because he lived in Alaska, and I’ve lived.. well, all over. Kentucky, Texas, California.

But May 4, 2011, he finally told me “Kathryn, I don’t care how far away you are. I love you. I’ve always loved you. I know you’re the one for me, and I’ll make this work no matter what.”

And so it was. We’ve been together 4 months now.
He’s my best friend, my rock, and I’m his.
I’m 17 now, and he’s 19. He’s planning on moving down to Texas soon to be with me.
It’ll be the first time we ever meet in person.

He has a funny name and a good sense of humor, and well… he’s a little weird.
But the fact of the matter is, I love him.

And that’s just the way it is.